Welcome to the Dying with Grandpa Podcast! This is a short introduction to the podcast.
This podcast comes from my strong desire to provide a safe space to share thoughts and experiences. Since my grandfather’s death last fall, I’ve been obsessed with the topic of death and what it really means “to die.” In this intro I share one of the first experiences I had losing a loved one and what it taught me about fear.
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How did I get on this path? Why do I share what I’ve learned about my grandfather’s death? The simple answer is: I have to.
My grandfather died back in the fall of 2014. He would have been 87 years old that coming Wednesday had he not died. It was a beautiful cool Monday morning in October when I said my final farewell to him. I still remember how excitedly he talked about his birthday just two weeks prior to his death. There was no party, though. And I am not sure one was even planned, It’s as if we weren’t sure he’d be with us, in physical form at least, on that day. And he wasn’t.
My grandfather’s death seemed right on schedule for another layer of spiritual growth in my life. I was going through yet another layer of painful “ego shedding”, (to put it politely), and I wasn’t sure I could handle his death. I wasn’t prepared and I was tired. You see, the prior two years of my life had been so challenging and I wasn’t even sure who I was anymore. All my beliefs about myself were being tested, over and over again. I had no strength to fight life anymore and resigned myself to his death. But, surprisingly, it seemed the more I dived into his death experience, the more alive I felt. And when it was all said and done, I felt like I had completed a mastery course in life.
What’s funny is I wouldn’t understand the impact it had on me until many months later. But the changes I would make in my life would propel me into a new level of living. I would begin again, all from a pact between my grandfather and I. I learned there is no death, just a misinformed perception of death based in fear of the unknown.
It’s been almost a year since I began sorting all of death’s teachings, and now it is time to share the gifts that death, (i.e. change), has given me. So forgive me if I stumble with my words from time to time. Bringing forth words from feelings can be difficult.
One thing is for sure, though,
I’ve been touched by death, have you?